Grass isn't always greener on the other side of the fence: water does the trick.

Even Bree Van Da Camp knows the secret to a very green grass:#susan💋

I have been having what they call writer's block ( not that I am a @Kaygreins or @Olanike) . My life has been bumpy lately and I am glad it has been, at least relationship wise. Well you can say I appreciate my partner better than I did in the past soso years.

I am sure we know that saying "Grass isn't always greener on the other side" , while this particular adage has been underused its underlying meaning is still very much evident. We all have the grass is greener on the other side of the fence syndrome. This syndrome implies that we think there is something better out there that we are missing. This could be in respect to our relationship, careers or living condition, we at some point assume we have it worse or that far better is out there, it shows we have no security, stability, contentment in our present condition. So we have one foot in the door and one foot out in the other world.

This syndrome is mostly based on fear and fantasy. The fear of commitment, the fear of boredom, the fear of losing our own individuality, the fear of freedom, the fear of being oppressed, the fear of compromising too much etc. all this fear leads to the fantasy aspect.

Fantasy is the imagination unrestricted by reality. it leads inevitably to projection. We start to want what we don't have , we start to have the illusion that there is definitely something/ someone out there that we don't have to compromise for. 

Like in the case of a relationship, we sometimes think this my partner can be so annoying, and we start to admire that colleague that comes and sit with us everyday, making us smile, listening attentively to all of our problems, showing us care, we start to pick up on the imperfections of our relationship, we start to compare, we start to wish we were with him / her. The fact is that no one is ever like your partner ( no one!). That thing you are seeing in that other guy that is making your heart fluster , your palm sweat is just an illusion, just make believe sweety. If only we knew what their own partners are facing, if only we knew what horrible boyfriends/ girlfriends they make.

@juicyjane was on the  radio one day talking about how we are all so too comfortable around our partners and we seize to impress them anymore ( the 'see me finish' syndrome). With our partners we act our true self, we act nasty, childish, disgusting and we don't apologize for it even if we hurt them with our utterance we don't really care.but with Mr Other/Miss Other we act close to perfect, our speeches are restrained. We don't want to ever hurt their feelings. it is not like we are pretenders, it is just what we do unconsciously. It comes naturally.

We are so thinking " if only I met this dude /babe before seeing my partner. We are so perfect for each other".

Dear Readers! If only you knew..... That soft spoken, angelic looking lady, that says good morning to everyone at work might just be an untamable beast with her partner , the good looking, confident, brilliant, nice , outspoken guy that makes your days at work brighter might just be a stone cold bastard with his partner. 

So my dears before you dump your long and bumpy relationship for that one that looks so serene, before you dump that job , before to accept that deal, Think well.( the devil you know is far better than that angel that is smiling)

That been said, don't fall for the illusion of perfection ,don't fall for the honeymoon stage (it would pass), nothing good in life comes without issues and compromise.

 THE GRASS IS ONLY AS GREEN AS YOU WATER IT( the more water you feed it, the greener and more luscious it gets ).