Love is a losing game...and an unnecessary ride on a roller coaster

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“I love you” i said


“Okay, I will talk to you later” he mumbled


Going through the motions because how can you fix something that is not necessarily broken 


It started out like every other overplayed sad romantic story. it started like a fairy tale. Girl sees boy, boy talks to her and she gets flipping butterflies. Boy sees girl, girl smiles at him and he pats down his chest and says ‘she is the one’…..


But reality sets in, life and love is not like Meredith Grey and Derek Shepherd love story or maybe it just is. Well ….


They tell you compromise is the name of the winning ingredient in relationships, they say if you love someone you have to learn to compromise; you have to learn to be vulnerable. 


What happens when he makes you too soft and mushy and it turns out that is not his type?


What happens when you finally learn to love and be in love? 


What happens when you finally learn how to let someone take care of you?


What happens when all you can and have been able to do is compromise?


What happens when you become an addict to what only he is offering?


What happens when you killed all other goose so that just this one can live?


What happens when it looks like you are not getting back what you are giving?


You realize how much you adore this person.


You realize that you would back this person even to the hilt of the sword. 


You literally feel your heart breaking, your head banging, your eyes can’t seem to stay opened because you are scared it might start to flood and the gate no longer functions. You just want to curl up on your big mattress and listen to the banks and SZA. 


You realize the next step would be very difficult… THE DECLARATION "We are done".


You turn into a coward and decide, the declaration can wait and you say ‘going through the motions is much better’.

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